Entries from September 2024 ↓

My granddaughter called me last night To wish me a happy birthday. A call from my young granddaughter Pleases me more than I can say. She asked me just how old I was; I told her I turned sixty five. She said that’s a real big number; “Are you the oldest man alive?” I told […]

My vegetarian friends say that I am cruel and bad. The meat I eat for dinner was some poor critter’s mom or dad. I may eat Mom or Dad and aunts and uncles maybe. But I find it much more tender to eat the critter’s baby. They say that God will get me, for eating […]

“You are surely grumpy,” Is the first thing Mother said. “You must have gotten up On the wrong side of your bed.” Gramps said, “When you’re grumpy, You’ve got a rock in your shoe.” And Gramps sure ought to know ‘Cause he’s always grumpy too. Dad said, “If you’re grumpy, It’s because you’ve had bad […]

He tried to run and hide from God, Somewhere God would never find him, In a boat to a distant shore, So he wouldn’t have to mind him. But then an awful storm blew up, And the crew began to worry. Jonah knew that he could save them But that he would have to hurry. […]

Chocolates give you tummy aches, Mom bought some at the mall. Mom won’t get a tummy ache Because I ate them all!