Category: Poems for Grownups

She’s the most feared lady In Burleson County. She’s not a cop Or sheriff or Mountie. She drives around In her pickup truck. When you see her coming You’ve had better luck. She measures your house And photos your barn. The things that you call her Are a lot worse than “darn”. She checks all […]

A few holes of golf, while she was on call, She loudly called FORE and then hit the ball. And that’s when she heard the poor fellow’s cries. He was there on the ground, his hand twixt his thighs. His legs tight together like they’d never disjoin. She knelt by his side, massaging his groin. […]

The young priest said to the bishop, “Attendance had become kind of poor. I faithfully held confession But no one came any more.” “They all say they are too busy, They don’t seem to have any time. I just tried to make it go faster, Is that such a terrible crime?” The bishop said to […]

Why was he banging on my door At this ungodly hour for? Unsteady as a wind blown bush He asked, “Will you give me a push? “Look,” I said, “It’s awfully late And you’re so drunk, you can’t stand straight.” I slammed the door and back in bed Erased his problems from my head. Again […]

I wanted to be a circuit preacher when I finished Bible school. I never would get rich but I’d be Gods pliant tool. Building a reputation, practice preaching on weekends; I’d taught in lots of churches and I’d made a lot of friends. One little country church, I had liked especially. I preached there several […]