Category: General Humor

He was really getting to me, Stopping at each intersection, Beating on his panel truck With a kind of planned perfection. He would jump out of his truck With a wooden baseball bat And bang upon the old truck’s sides With a rat-a tat-tat-tat. He was getting on my nerves, Why should I endure this […]

“You are a most unusual man,” She said holding on to his hand “You look just like my third husband, You’re so tall, and handsome, and tanned.” He said, “That’s a nice thing to say,” Although he thought it to be true. “How many husbands have you had?” She said, “Well, so far, only two!”

The city mayor passed away, The widow asked if I would sing. I called her on the telephone To ask what music I should bring. “He wanted ‘Jingle Bells’,” she said, As she was fighting back her tears. I thought it strange but, well I knew, The mayor had gotten up in years. So, next […]

I had to walk her poodle With its yip and yap and all. A poodle’s just not a dog. It won’t even chase a ball. The fellows would meet at Joe’s, Where we’d play a game or two. But dogs are never allowed, Just what was a man to do? That was when I saw […]

We were standing in the park, Just talking about dying. Talking about our funerals And if there’d be lots of crying. That kind of stupid talking Makes me a little nervous. Then they asked me what I want said At my own funeral service. One guy hoped that they would say, That he’d been a […]