Category: Poems for Grownups

The Iraqi’s wife walked in front. I told him it was good to see, That treating women as equals Was a sign of democracy. He said, “Forget democracy And forget all your crazy signs. I have to let her walk in front Because of the stupid land-mines!”

My doctor never believes Anything that I say. She asks me how much I weigh, Then weighs me anyway!

The mountain man stood in Old Doc’s office Angrily shifting his chaw. “You need to fix this man up, Doc, Because he’s my son-in-law.” “I shot him full of buckshot But I reckon he ain’t hurt that much. You fix him up real good And I’ll pay you with eggs and such.” “You shot your […]

The twins were known As the terrible two, There wasn’t a thing They wouldn’t do. The tricks they played On Halloween, Would some day make The movie screen. Their mother grew Tired of their pranks. She asked for help >From Father Franks. Father said, “Sure, It’s worth my time, To save them from A life […]

I have never once been fired But I’m the first to admit, When they stop paying me I get mad and quit. I didn’t lose my job, That’s all that there is to it. I know right where it is They’ve just got someone else to do it. I’m not afraid of work, No matter […]