Category: Quickies

“If you lose thirty pounds,” His slightly plump wife said, “I’ll dance for you each night Before we go to bed.” The husband told his wife, Observing her tight pants, “If you lose thirty pounds, I just might watch you dance!”

My friend said to cook a hot dog Roast it and eat it on a bun. Well, it was certainly tasty I think I’ll catch another one.

If God answered all our prayers, We might not think it very nice. If He’d given me all I prayed for I’d have married the wrong man… TWICE!!!

If at first one doesn’t succeed, The sage advice has always been, That one should not give up the task; But he should try and try again. The best advice, I’ve come to find, Is advice that’s been time tested: To avoid a fight, first do it The way your wife suggested!

She never was the best of cooks I married her only for her looks. Last night I snuck her old cat, Lou A goodly portion of my stew. “Now Honey, don’t you cry like that, I’ll buy you another cat!”