Category: Married Life

He found a little mirror, A thing he’d never seen. He picked a clump of ragweed And wiped the surface clean. It looked just like his father, Who had been dead for years! Such unhappy memories… It kindled hidden fears. He would hide it in the woods Far from his old wife’s eyes. To see […]

A lie detector robot! He knew he’d have to buy it. He couldn’t wait to get it home; To plug it in and try it. He decided he would try it first On his unruly teenage son, To see what kind of mischief He and his friends had done. When his son came home at […]

He had wanted a boat For his whole married life; An argument ongoing With his too-thrifty wife. She finally relented To his constant whining, And gave him her blessing While they were out dining. “But I get to name it!” Her sole stipulation. Which he hardly noticed In his jubilation. His pleading and begging Were […]

“If you lose thirty pounds,” His slightly plump wife said, “I’ll dance for you each night Before we go to bed.” The husband told his wife, Observing her tight pants, “If you lose thirty pounds, I just might watch you dance!”

She said, “The neighbors’ dogs Are driving me crazy. Don’t they hear them barking, Or are they just lazy?” “Don’t they know their two dogs, In their yard, bark all night?” Then she said, getting up, “They’re asking for a fight.” The dogs were still barking As she got back in bed. “I guess that […]