Category: Poems for Grownups

He had talked back to the sergeant? He was stupid instead of brave. “So when I die,” the sergeant asked, You’ll be there dancing on my grave?” “There’s no way”, the private answerd, With his usual silly grin. “Once I get outta the Army I ain’t standing in line again!”

He was young and he was strong. He could run the whole day long. With just the strength of arm and leg, He could climb the highest crag. He knew that with his strength alone, He could protect both flesh and bone. So he would climb the highest heights, Just to enjoy the lofty sights. […]

The meeting was important. He had driven twice around. He needed a parking space, There wasn’t one to be found. He began to pray out loud, “Lord, find me a parking space And I’ll give up my drinking, And spend Sundays at your place.” But God wasn’t hearing him, It was just as he had […]

Our dumb dog killed the neighbor’s cat And dragged him back into our yard. That poor old cat sure looked as if He had been treated mighty hard. Mom knew our neighbors weren’t at home, They’d planned on being out of town. She said that she’d make things look right While there was no one […]

With the cowboy’s thick Jewish accent, I could understand one word in three. He warned, “Don’t go up da mountain trail Because up dere ees a bacon tree.” My horse was very tired and hungry, He wouldn’t last the trip around. And a “bacon tree” would be the least Of all of the dangers I […]