Category: General Humor

My husband called me from the washroom, “I’m going to wash my shirt,” he said, “I’ve worn it for a week already, Your mom says it smells like something dead.” In the school of weekend mechanics My talented husband is the dean, But he knows absolutely nothing About running a washing machine. “What temp setting […]

It was past midnight, I was going to bed, When I saw two fellows Breaking into my shed. I locked all my doors And I wished for a gun, But all I could do Was to call nine-one-one. The dispatcher told me, “We have no one near. It will be half an hour So sit […]

I wonder, if pigs learned to talk, Would they criticize each other? Would they say, “You’re such a human!” To a sister or a brother? If a mouse owned a computer, Just imagine it if you can, When he moved the little arrow D’you think he’d use a tiny man? If a horse could tell […]

My grandmother always told me That I should pick my friends with care. She said that some friends that I chose Were more than her old bones could bear. She said I shouldn’t get attached To the wrong kind of a friend. She said that they’ll just drag you down And take you with them […]

He called his landlord on the phone “The roof leaks over my table, You need to come here and fix it Just as soon as you are able.” “Just how do you know there’s a leak?” The tightwad landlord was quick to ask, He was not at all looking forward To such an expensive task. […]