Category: General Humor

You can go to bed early But always get up late, Or you might make a meal For some early bird’s plate. If you’re asked out fishing Be wary of the date, Until you ask the guys What they’re gonna use for bait.

“What caused your wreck?” the doctor asked While he was setting another bone. “Peanuts,” the bus driver told him, In a dejected kind of tone. “Peanuts?” the doctor asked the man, “Just how did peanuts cause your wreck? I guess you know how close you came To dying with a broken neck?” “They kept feeding […]

I have a good partner That’s close as a brother. At somebody’s first glance We look like each other. He has all the talent, Smartest one of us two, He mostly leads the way In the things that we do. Though I’ll take the lead When we have a fistfight, He is the only one […]

I was sitting at a light Feeling kind of bored, When a guy drove up beside me In a plain old common Ford. Now a Ford just isn’t one Of my favorite cars of choice. I was waiting for the light Sitting there in my Rolls Royce. Then the guy who owned the Ford Began […]

Well, why didn’t she go? The light had just turned green. She was the dumbest broad That he had ever seen! He honked and then he cursed. He rolled his window down, And made a vulgar sign. “The stupid lady clown!” Then a cop stopped in back And told him to get out. He asked, […]