Category: Mangled Nursery Rhymes

Tom, Tom, the piper’s son Stole a pig but he didn’t run. He said no one could make him pay, Since he belonged to the P.E.T.A. That’s why he said he turned it loose. It went next door and killed a goose And they threw its owner in the calaboose.

Little Miss Willow Sat on a pillow And there she was going to stay. But a spider beside ’er Convinced our Miss Willow That she should go elsewhere to play. By R. Wayne Edwards

Five little piggies All went out to eat, Which for little pigs Is always a treat. Two piggies had trout And two pigs had brim. The fifth said water Was enough for him. Three pigs ate whole pies, One ate a quarter. The littlest pig Drank only water. The waiter’s comment, “It’s so weird, I […]

Hickory, Dickory and Doc Three mice that lived in a clock. The clock struck one with such a knock Now there’s only Dickory and Doc.

Mary had a little lamb And it was such a pity. They came and took her lamb away ‘Cause she lived in the city.