Category: Growing Older

“The secret of long life,” Gramps said, “A pinch of gunpowder at every meal. It will keep your body healthy And aches and pains will quickly heal.” It must have worked for Grandpa, He lived to be a hundred and three. He’s best remembered for the crater Where the crematorium used to be.

In search for greener pastures, I spared no expense. But when I finally found them, I was too old to climb the fence.

The three of us were standing there, One with a walker, two with canes. We were all there drinking coffee And discussing our aches and pains. Then one fellow dropped his car keys, While he was filling up his cup. We just stood there, three helpless guys, No one could bend to pick them up!

I’d been called for jury duty, it was hurry up and wait; While they tried to pick the twelve who’d decide some poor guy’s fate. We all compared our numbers as we stood there in the hall, Each one of us in secret hoped we wouldn’t get the call. I had spent my boyhood here, […]

The deal was that they make no sound, If so, their plane ride would be free. It was an open-air bi-wing, The old plane had no canopy Today was dear old Bea’s birthday And she had never flown before, I’d promised her an airplane ride Back when she was 74. The pilot was a raucous […]