Category: Poems for Grownups

Have you seen my grandma? She’s been gone for days. She really got caught up In that stupid walking craze. She was way too quick to listen To the things that people say. Someone told her she should walk At least five miles every day. So if you see my grandma Will you kindly let […]

Mommy has a scary machine, It really makes a lot of noise. I’ve seen it eat a pair of socks And some of my favorite toys. She walks it all around the house She has to walk it every day. She keeps it tied up to the wall I guess so it won’t get away. […]

The captain said, “Sergeant, your men all stink. You have to make them change their underwear.” The sergeant thought the captain kind of weird Or maybe too long in the desert air. But the captain’s word was the word of God So he told his men what they had to do. “Everybody take your underwear […]

The worm was having a great day, Tunneling happily through the muck. When he came upon such beauty, Love hit him like a two ton truck. Her skin was so brown and shiny, Her curves were such a lovely sight. He’d always been a timid worm But what the heck, she couldn’t bite. So he […]

The warden’s daughter got married To someone down on cell block two. She was never very pretty Her choice of suitors had been few. He’s not the kind of son-in-law For which the warden would have hoped, But still he didn’t get upset, Until he found out they’d eloped.