Entries from October 1999 ↓

(Click on a title to see the full entry with graphics.)

X-Ray Technician

So very much To my dismay I killed a man The other day. I took an x-ray Of his chest Though doctors say That I’m the best, That it’s my fault’s Not hard to prove. I told the man, “Don’t breathe or move.” I took the x-ray From my stall Processed and hung it On […]

Grandma’s Boyfriend

Grandma’s got a boyfriend He’s really quite a gent Though he walks a little crooked And his fingers are all bent. When he comes to call on Grandma He smells of wintergreen, But he always brings her flowers And he treats her like a queen. His hair goes ’round his head Like a snowy Christmas […]


The plane was there; the engine was running, Just like they said it would be. Taking pictures needed of the forest fire Would now be just up to me. I jumped in the plane and yelled to the pilot, “Get this thing off of the ground!” With a worried look he replied to me, But […]

Expiration Date

People think that things have changed Since the Holy Book was written. They say that God has changed his mind Since His only Son was smitten. They say that hell is just a myth Because their God is much too kind. To justify their favorite sin, They claim the Scripture’s mis-defined. Some try to change […]

Toilet Paper

The farmer heard that Sears Was the cheapest place to buy, So he thought that just this once He’d give their store a try. He needed toilet paper So he wrote to ask their price. He said he’d heard how cheap they were And that their quality was nice. They sent him back a catalog […]