When I went to see my uncle
The one who owns a turkey farm;
I had a little accident
That amputated my left arm.
Then on a trip to Africa
I tried to steal an ostrich egg
I could tell she wasn’t happy
Because she kicked off my left leg.
So I went back to see the bird
I thought I’d have another try.
The dumb ostrich was still angry
Because she pecked out my left eye.
I guess I made lots of goofs
And so I really look a sight.
But from now on you can be sure
That everything I do is right!
Wayne Edwards is a native Texan, graduate of Texas A&M University, and retired Air Force officer. He lives, with his wife Ruth, on a fish farm in Texas, in an underground house he built himself. Wayne can be reached via e-mail at 