Category: Married Life

Poor old Tom was dying;
By his bed sat his wife.
He asked for one last wish
Before he left this life.
“Of course,” she said, “My dear,
Just ask me anything.
Is it something I can do,
Or something I can bring?”
“It’s something you can do,
As soon as I am dead,
I want you to marry
Our next door neighbor, Fred.”
“Are you sure [...]

Adam and Eve
Had their first fight,
He’d stayed out,
Too late at night.
Adam said, “Eve,
It’s plain as can be,
There’s no other
Woman for me.”
“I’ll not believe
More of your fibs.
Come over here;
Let me count your ribs!”

They told the marriage counselor
All of their irks and all their woes woes.
How they’d stayed this long together
I don’t think anybody knows.
Then the counselor grabbed the wife
He held her tight and then he kissed her;
A very long and passionate kiss,
Not the kind he’d give his sister!
Then he told the startled husband
“I’ve demonstrated what wives seek,
Your [...]

Bob decided to retire
To spend more time with his wife,
To bring a little joy into
Her otherwise mundane life.
He first noticed her housekeeping,
How its quality had declined.
To guide her through this trying time,
A husband must be firm but kind.
He suggested she take a job,
To get finances back on par.
He sacrificed and took the truck
So she could [...]

He can name all of the quarterbacks
On every team in the NFL.
He can remember all of the jokes
That I hate for him to tell.
He can recall every argument,
That we had when I was wrong.
And he knows all of the words
To every dumb hillbilly song.
He remembers hunting season
And the hour that it begins.
He knows the scores [...]