They told me the surely best way
Of getting my very own puppy
Is to ask for some other pet
And not something small like a guppy.

They said don’t ask for a kitten
‘Cause that could be a mistake.
Tell Mom you can’t live without
A really big monstrous pet snake.

Get pictures of fearsome examples,
And then with a little boy smile,
Tell Mom how much you will love her
For buying you a big reptile.

And when you next shop at the Mall
Drag Mom into the pet store.
Walk right past the cute little pups
To snakes that are six feet or more.

Now mothers are all scared of snakes
She’ll suggest a goldfish or guppy.
Then cry and beg for the snake
And finally give in for a puppy.

SHE GOT ME THAT STUPID REPTILE!
Now what in the world will I do?
I never expected to get one
I’m deathly afraid of snakes too!