He was the average corporate lawyer
But Henry had always had one flaw.
It was the love for things material
And that is why Henry practiced law.

He bought himself a brand new Jaguar,
A car that cost him a lot of bread.
He’d gotten the Jaguar just for show,
So he had picked fire engine red.

Henry always parked it on the street
For all of his neighbors to adore.
Today as he started to get out,
A drunken driver ripped off his door.

A policeman saw the accident,
He hurried over to render aid.
The car was the lawyer’s lone concern
As he screamed about how much he’d paid.

“You lawyers are materialistic,”
The policeman said with quick alarm.
“And it doesn’t bother you at all,
That the car ripped off your whole left arm?”

The lawyer looked at his bleeding stump
And began to curse a streak of blue.
“Well of all the crazy stupid luck,
The drunken bum got my Rolex too!”