Last Rites


“There’s a body”, yelled the priest,
“Right out on the church front lawn.
It’s a jackass someone’s dumped
And I want to see it gone.”

The sergeant turned the phone call
Over to old Sheriff Gunn.
He could tell the priest was mad
And he thought he’d have some fun.

He said, “I know a dead jackass
Is not among your favorite sights.
But isn’t it your priestly duty
To give the dead their last rites?”

The priest, with anger mounting
To the point of mortal sin
Said, “It’s also my priestly duty
To notify the next of kin!”

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