I Tell You the Truth

Written for the 3rd Anniversary
of Randy and Lori’s tenure as youth pastors
at College Heights Assembly of God

He was a tall man, who came out of the north
In answer to God, who told him, “Go Forth”.
He arrived on time, not his usual trait,
For since that day he has always been late.
Since he arrived here he’s turned two into three.
How good is his math, we’ll just wait and see?
Will he have a big family? His very own troops?
Just how many times can Randy say, “OOPS”?
If he wants lots of kids, just what will God say,
After he forgot Matthew in his office one day.
He gave up his cable and sports that is true,
Now he watches reruns of Winnie the Pooh.
Randy’s head’s on a picture, with triceps and biceps
But out of his shirt, you see excepts and decepts.
You can talk about Randy without any fear,
Just stand to his left, he’s deaf in that ear.
Somebody said they were willing to bet
That Randy’s as tall as Yankees can get.
When people meet Randy and see that he’s tall,
They always ask him if he played basketball.
Well he’s no athlete, he did play some hockey
So he looks down and asks, “Were you ever a jockey?”
As tall as he is, it’s sure a safe bet,
When it’s starting to rain, he’s the first to get wet.
Lori says nothing happens the nights Randy preaches
And I’ve got a few stories from the kids Randy teaches.
Responsibility so great, he must get up at dawn.
We can grade pastor’s sermons by the size of his yawn.
He’s sure a great guy, we all love him you see,
But is he the kind of a man, you’d let sell you a tree?


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