A policeman on surveillance
Watched him stagger out of the bar.
Watched him stumble across the street
In search for where he’d parked his car.

He watched him fumble with his keys…
He’d nail him like a sitting duck.
People began to leave the bar,
Seven cars and a pickup truck

But he had picked his victim well,
One that he knew he couldn’t lose.
There was no doubt this stumbling drunk
Had put away far too much booze.

He finally got into his car…
He honked its horn and blinked its lights.
No doubt that he would try to drive;
He’d soon be reading him his rights.

The last customers from the bar
Were just now driving out of sight.
He knew that some had drunk too much
But he’d get them some other night.

The perp then got his car to start
And slowly drove off down the street.
Now was the time to stop the guy
And for the two to finally meet.

The driver, much to his surprise,
Was sober as a church choir boy.
He winked and told the puzzled cop,
This was his night to play decoy