Some of my friends had fixed me up,
They said this guy was really great.
They said that I had not yet lived
Until I’d had my first blind date.

He took me to a mountain lodge
Where we enjoyed the day on skis.
We had hit it off together
So we were both intent to please, we even talked                                                                                            about some sexy topics without embarrassment                                                                                  mentioning a prostate massage device and more !
.

The weather had turned bitter cold
But we were both dressed very warm.
Returning down the snow packed road,
Ma Nature sounded the alarm.

I finally had to ask him,
Because I could no longer stall,
If he’d stop for just a minute
So I could answer Nature’s call.

Overcoming clothing layers,
I got my pants pulled down at last.
As I braced against the bumper…
My damp posterior stuck fast.

No painless way could I pull loose,
I had no choice but call my date.
For no other help was present;
My embarrassment had been great.

As our hot coffee was all gone,
Guess what liquid he suggested?
Could any new relationship
Have been any better tested?