Entries from February 2008 ↓

My brother took my coke away,
He said because he had a thirst.
Wonder if I should have told him
That I had shaken it up first?

Although ninety years old,
Jack played golf every day,
So he was unhappy,
His sight was slipping away.
He could still hit the ball
A good country mile,
But not seeing its flight
Was cramping his style.
His wife said, “Take Herby,
He has perfect eyesight.
He’s a hundred and two
But he’s still very spright.”
So Jack took old Herby,
To watch him tee off,
Ignoring his wheezing
And [...]

There’s nothing that Alia likes
More than to color in her book.
She uses colors that she likes
And never cares how strange they look.
Who made the rules that skies are blue
Or that the grass has to be green?
The horses that she colors pink
Are prettier than some I have seen.
If you’ve not seen a purple cow,
Then you’ve not [...]

A small town prosecutor
Called his first witness to the stand.
A grandmotherly type woman
Took the oath with upraised hand.
“Mrs. Jones, do you know me?”
“Yes, ever since you were a child,
You lie and cheat on your wife
And know how to get people riled.”
“You think that you’re a big shot,
In the piddly things that you do.
You don’t amount [...]

She asked me for my help,
She needed to sell her car.
It had 250,000
Miles on it so far.
With so many miles on it,
No one would even look.
She said she had to sell it
No matter what it took.
So I turned her mileage back
To 50,000 miles,
Using a special wrench
And an old mechanic’s wiles.
When I saw her one week [...]