Category: Southern Humor

All of my wife’s friends Have brand new fur coats, The beautiful ladies And the two old goats. She asked me to buy A new coat for her, But I couldn’t afford The expense of a fur. And then if by chance, Or maybe by luck, I hit a huge dog With my pickup truck! [...]

The farmer’s young wife, May Bell, Nagged him daily as a rule. She thought her husband lazy And she hated his old mule. May Bell took him lunch one day And walked up beside the plow, A bit closer to the mule, Than good prudence would allow. The sheriff said that the mule Fatally kicked [...]

The catalogue came last week And there on page seventeen Was the prettiest little woman That Buford had ever seen. At forty seven ninety nine The woman really did look nice And with the shipping throwed in free You really couldn’t beat the price. He sent his order right away. And told Hank, his friend, [...]

I was going to pick some fruit From my grandfather’s apple tree. I was carrying a bucket And I was whistling happily. As I walked by Grandpa’s stock pond, I noticed lots of water swirls. I knew from all the piles of clothes I’d found some skinny-dipping girls. It wasn’t long a head appeared, Then [...]

‘Twas the night before Christmas and down at the trailer park Not a creature was stirring, not a one since it got dark. A big red candle was lit on our front room window sill More ‘portant to buy presents, than to pay the ‘lectric bill. Rastus, the coon dog, was tied and the latch [...]