My glasses must be the problem,
I’ve not seen that much dust before.
So now I’ll take off my glasses
Before I come in the front door!

“Ten weeks, ten months, ten what?” Ben asked.
“Is it something that you can fix?”
The doctor just kept on counting;
“Nine,” then “eight,” then “seven,” then “six…”

He was always in a hurry
So who’s the slowpoke now?
If she made him wait this long,
He would have a holy cow.

He wouldn’t use a cell phone,
No way that she could call.
He said he hated shopping,
Was he still inside the mall?

It had been at least an hour.
She was really getting mad!
She thought, “He doesn’t love me;
He wouldn’t treat his dog this bad!”

She decided to call home
Her husband’s voice came on the phone!
He said, “You know how much I worry,
When you go shopping all alone.”

He was supposed to memorize
The entire Gettysburg Address,
Which was causing my grandson
A lot of worry and distress.

So I recited it for him,
As I had learned it long ago.
It was to him a big surprise
That it was something I would know.

He said, “It’s easy to recall
Something that you actually saw.”
When Lincoln made his famous speech,
Were you at Gettysburg, Grandpa?”

Although ninety years old,
Jack played golf every day,
So he was unhappy,
His sight was slipping away.

He could still hit the ball
A good country mile,
But not seeing its flight
Was cramping his style.

His wife said, “Take Herby,
He has perfect eyesight.
He’s a hundred and two
But he’s still very spright.”

So Jack took old Herby,
To watch him tee off,
Ignoring his wheezing
And occasional cough.

Jack hit his first ball
On a long curving flight,
Depending on Herby
With his perfect eyesight.

“Did you see where it went,
Could you follow my ball?”
“Of course,” said old Herby,
“But I can’t seem to recall.”