Category: Church Humor

(Click on a title to see the full entry with graphics.)

The Out-of-Tune Chandelier

The preacher said to the deacon board, “I would like to buy a chandelier.” The deacons said, “Why waste our money, There’s nobody that could play one here.” One deacon then said, to the pastor, “You are always asking for the moon, You know that we are not fancy folks. Besides, I hear that they’re […]

Two Envelopes

He had come to this large church, To test his pastor skills. He was sure of his ability And sure of his preaching skills. The deacon board, they warned him, Was really tough to please. Now this first confrontation Had sent him to his knees. This problem had arisen With which he could not cope, […]

A Little Boy’s Prayer

Lord, I know I’ve not been good, Sometimes I’m very bad. Mommy says the things I do Are sure to make you sad. She says that I should pray each night That you would make me good; So if you’ve time to hear my prayer, Please help me do the things I should. I know […]

Church Foot

My foot just went to sleep. It does it out of spite. I hate it when it happens. Now it’s gonna be up all night.

The Pastor’s False Teeth

The pastor got a new set of teeth, Sunday’s sermon was eight minutes long. His speech sounded hesitant and garbled, The choir covered it up with a song. The next Sunday he spoke for ten minutes, The church members were all very moved, His sermon was short but inspiring And his diction had surely improved. […]