Entries from September 2005 ↓

My mother said, as I crawled into bed,
“Don’t let the bedbugs bite.”
I haven’t a clue of what I can do
But I’ll put up one heck of a fight!
Are bedbugs as big as a guinea pig?
Would they rather bite girls, or boys?
Do they wait in the dark with a knife [...]

Mister rabbit stood
At the Old Wishing Well
And wished that he had
A bushy long tail.
He threw in some nickels
And pennies and dimes
And wished a hundred
And twenty-three times.
He spent all the money
He had to buy food,
Which had gotten him in
A terribly bad mood.
Why hadn’t he noticed
The sign by the stairs?
“The Old Wishing Well
Is closed for repairs.”
“WARNING, WARNING, [...]

“There are no such things as ghosts. It’s all in your stupid head!” I told my little brother, As we got ready for bed.
“There are no such things as ghosts.” And I made it very clear. “It’s stupid to believe in ghosts, So you have nothing to fear.”
He pointed under his bed, We [...]

The state trooper saw her coming, She was driving way too slow. Everyone behind was honking, Trying to get her to go.
He clocked her going twenty-three. She would get somebody killed! All the drivers stuck behind her, He could see, were not too thrilled.
So he stopped her and told her [...]

When you get dressed, Give thought to whether The things you wear Go well together.
Two things for sure, With negative zing, Are bifocals And a big nose ring.
And you who seek Youthful adventures, Don’t pierce your tongue If you wear dentures.
You’ll not do well, Attempting to flirt, In support hose [...]