Entries from July 2002 ↓

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Brakes

My sister called, from shopping. She had car trouble again. The way my sis treats that car Has got to be a major sin. Exasperated, I asked “What’s wrong now, for goodness sakes?” She said she just discovered That her didn’t have any brakes! I said I would pick her up And asked where her […]

First Day of Kindergarten

She could see he was squirming, The little boy named Scotty. “Raise your hand with two fingers If you have to go potty.” A good time to explain rules; But before she could get through, Scotty asked, hysterically, “What good is that gonna do?”

Passing Acquaintances

My parachute had failed to open And my reserve chute failed to work too A man passed me by on a gas stove I thought that he might know what to do. “Know anything about parachutes?” I yelled as he was passing me by. “You know anything about gas stoves” He yelled as he sped […]

Hide-and-Seek

Everyone likes to play hide-and-seek But it’s no fun for me.. Close my eyes and count to a hundred, But I can only count to three!

Last Rites

“There’s a body”, yelled the priest, “Right out on the church front lawn. It’s a jackass someone’s dumped And I want to see it gone.” The sergeant turned the phone call Over to old Sheriff Gunn. He could tell the priest was mad And he thought he’d have some fun. He said, “I know a […]